http://pierovggsterf4w5xplynqtl56srftc242l3g2xloqlty6nv7372xuyd.onion
At least Python’s http.server saves the day for the way around. Then, today, I remembered Bluetooth, which the card I had lying around supports! My motherboard (an ASRock B650 PG Lightning) has a m.2 slot for WiFi cards, so I decided to give it a try.